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Monday, January 9, 2012

On a frozen night like this

It's -24C (-11F) out, and it's not my favorite. 

I woke up after sleeping a few hours. 1am turned into 5am and now i'm craving some toasted bread with melted butter.

Like always my head is spinning. It's been over 20 hours since i waved goodbye to my wonderful amazing husband at the airport in Stockholm. And yes, i have cried my eyes red and swollen, still there's a few tears left to let run free.

At the beginning of this new year it's time to reflect back on what has been and look forward to what is to come. twenty eleven was not my favorite year, in fact i think i can say it has been the worst year of my life. Heavy, long, dark and cold. Painful. It has been filled with a lot of sadness, hardships and bad news. Never ending nightmares. 

The good news is that during these seasons in life we have opportunity to grow and learn. It's been a perfect time to grow character, to learn how to trust and rest in God, get priorities and values straighten out.
Key in this messy painful blur is to choose to see, fully enjoy & remember the colorful happy moments. The breaths of air. To find the little and being thankful for it. 

Keep Hope as a close friend. Cling to God. He never fails. 

For this new year i wanted to start it off by making a few decisions. Small ones, but with radical results. 
Life changing ones. I want to, like many others, start it off by fasting and seeking God. But i realized that i wont be able to stay away from either food or sleep

(cause lack of any makes me a less pleasant person to be around.. ;) ).
So i decided to fast from wrong thinking, from worrying, from negativity
These that so sneaky tries to invade our lives.

Romans 12

1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.


Things i want to happen during twenty twelve;
make music & write songs, sew a handful of pretty things, keep renewing my mind, finish reading books i started, bake some chocolaty goodies, start working out again, smile more,  love out loud, but more than anything i want to finally have my Ryguy by my side <3